


Lend An Ear

by Listenerofshadows



Series: Sander Sides One-Shots [2]
Category: Sander Sides, Thomas Sanders, Thomas Sanders (Video Blogging RPF) - Fandom
Genre: (don't we all? smh), Anxiety | Virgil Sanders - Freeform, Dad!Patton comes to make everything better, Gen, Morality | Patton Sanders - Freeform, Virgil has a panic attack about math, human!AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-23
Updated: 2018-02-23
Packaged: 2019-03-22 18:31:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,722
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13770030
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Listenerofshadows/pseuds/Listenerofshadows
Summary: Virgil isn’t like Roman or Logan. He isn’t a talented actor or gifted brainiac, just an idiot who can’t understand algebra. It’s only a matter of time before Patton realizes that too, and sends him away. // Father-Son Moxiety, Human!AU





	Lend An Ear

**Author's Note:**

> This is a human!au where Patton is the adoptive father of Virgil, Roman, and Logan. Virgil’s birth father (who may or may not be Deceit) was abusive, and because of that he has trouble trusting Patton. Virgil is a freshman in high school in this fic. Hope you guys enjoy!

His heartbeat is beating too loudly–it crashes against his chest like a bird attempting to flee its cage. Maybe it’d be better off that way, Virgil thinks. He turns up the volume on his headphones, until he can no longer hear nothing but the loud thrashes and screeches of the drums and guitar.

 When the vocals start Virgil winces at how loud it is–but he doesn’t turn it down. Not when the alternative is listening to the loud palpitations of his heart and the racing thoughts that accompany it.

He stares down at the homework sheet that he’s been looking at for the past half hour. He wonders when math started to become a foreign language–who was the stupid person who decided adding the alphabet into the equation was a good idea?

Logan probably had an explanation for that. He always had an explanation for everything.

 _‘Maybe you should go ask him for help,’_  A stray thought suggests,  _‘he’d know how to solve it.’_

“No, no, no,” He mumbles under his breath, “Can’t do that.”

  
He already knows what Logan’s reaction is going to be. He’ll laugh and ridicule Virgil for being so inept at math–he just knows it.

He quickly wipes away the tears threatening to spill from his eyes with a sleeve of his hoodie. Great, now he’s crying about math like a baby. 

The door opens and someone enters, but Virgil doesn’t look up until he feels the bed shift under the weight of an added person.

“Hey kiddo, I tried knocking but I guess you didn’t hear me because of your music,” Patton says with a smile, “I know how much you like listening to your music, but you shouldn’t have your volume up too high or you’ll get tinnitus like your dad!”

  
Virgil winces slightly at the mention of “dad”–it often brought unfortunate connotations to his mind. He knows Patton didn’t mean any harm as it was a force of habit on his part. Patton tries to avoid using the word around Virgil, and isn’t offended that Virgil calls him Patton. Even Logan and Roman usually referred to the man by his first name rather than the paternal title.

Patton’s smile falters slightly when he realized his mistake. He opens his mouth to apologize when Virgil speaks up first. Patton didn’t need to apologize, it’s Virgil’s fault for being too sensitive to the word.

Virgil knows now that  _He_  hadn’t been a father to Virgil and didn’t deserve that title. It didn’t stop his mind from conjuring up his image every time he heard that word, though. Virgil hated it.

“What’s tinnitus?” Virgil asks, as he slowly takes off the headset.

“Oh! It’s when you get ringing in your ears that never goes away,” Patton cheerfully explains.

“Really?” Virgil raises a eyebrow.

“Really.” Patton confirms, “I imagine it’s hard for someone hasn’t experienced it to imagine what it’s like, so don’t try finding out for yourself by constantly listening to loud music.”

“Okay, okay, I get it,” Virgil rolls his eyes as he turns off his music, “I’m not Logan; you don’t have to worry about me conducting experiments in the house.”

He freezes after saying that. It’s the truth. He isn’t Logan. He’s not some gifted brainiac who’s bound to get a scholarship to Harvard or Yale. He isn’t even Roman, who’s such an insanely talented actor and writer that it’s not even funny. He’s just Virgil, a nobody.

If Patton noticed anything is off, he doesn’t say anything. Instead he grins.

“Of course you’re not Logan,” He says, “You’re Virgil!”

He says it with such earnestness, as if it’s a good thing Virgil isn’t Logan. Which clearly it isn’t. It’s only a matter of time before the man realizes he’s wasting time and money on a nobody. It’s only a matter of time before Patton realizes his mistake and sends him away.

“Yup,” Virgil sighs, looking down at his dreaded math sheet, “that’s me.”  
“Is something up, Virge?” Patton questions softly.

“No.” Virgil quickly denies it, then immediately feels guilty.

He can’t let Patton know the truth, he doesn’t want anyone to know how much of an idiot he truly is. If they knew, then they really wouldn’t like him. But Virgil hates lying because  _He_  used to do it all the time. Oh go–what if he’s starting to turn into him?!

“Are you sure?” Patton interrupts that thought before Virgil can start hyperventilating, “because I’m always here if you need someone to  _lend_  you an ear!”

He picks up one of Virgil’s science worksheets–a detailed diagram of an ear–and holds it up in front of his face.

Virgil is unable to stop the giggle that escapes his throat, instead choosing to hold his hand in front of his mouth.

“That wasn’t your best.” Virgil says after he regained control.

“Maybe, but it made you laugh,” Patton points out, before turning somber, “What’s wrong, kiddo? I know you like your alone time, but you’ve been in here for four hours. Have you eaten lunch at all?”

“No,” Virgil admits grimly.

“Why not?” Patton prods and Virgil stares at him in shock.

“What? You’re not going to lecture me for not eating?”

“It’s true that I don’t like knowing you’ve haven’t eaten anything since breakfast, but I can’t help you if you don’t explain why you haven’t.” Patton explains patiently, squeezing Virgil’s shoulder for reassurance.

He says that, and Virgil wants to believe Patton’s words so badly but his mind won’t let him. His thoughts keep reminding him of all the times  _He_  acted nice before  _He_  snapped at Virgil. He knows Patton has never done that, he’s never gotten angry in front of Virgil or the others. Even when he stubs his toes or accidentally touches a hot pan.

But he can’t help but think what if this time it happens. What if Patton just pretends to be nice like  _Him_ , and this will be the time he finally snaps.He knows that it’s silly, that it’s probably one of those cognitive distortions that Logan talks about.

 _‘But what if…’_  An allusive thought wonders.

He can’t lie, not again. He has to tell the truth, he has to say it quick like ripping off a band-aid.

“I was doing homework and I didn’t want to take a lunch break until I figured out to do the math problems but I can’t figure them o-out and i’m such an id-idiot–” 

Virgil takes a sharp breath and suddenly he's choking on air.

“Hey, it’s okay, kiddo, breathe,” Patton instructs, “Follow my lead; breath in four seconds, good! Now hold your breath for seven, and breath out for eight. I’ll count for you. One, two, three…”

They repeated it a few times until Virgil’s breathing resumed normally.

“Now, why do you think you’re an idiot?” Patton says in a soft, parental voice.

It’s not sharp or accusing like  _His_ voice would be, it sounds…more sad than anything else.Virgil doesn’t look at him.

“Be-because I don’t know how to do these math problems.” 

“Why didn’t you come to me or Logan for help?”

“I thought,” He hiccups, “I thought you guys would laugh at me.”

A pair of strong arms embraces him, and Virgil freezes before gladly melting in its’ hold.

“Oh Virgil,” Patton whispers, “You are not an idiot just because you need help with math. Everyone needs help at times.”

“Even Logan?” Virgil sniffles.

“Even Logan,” Patton affirms, “and Roman and you and even me. There’s no shame in asking for help. It’s not a weakness when you ask for help, it’s a strength.”

“But if all I do is ask for help?” Virgil says in a small voice, “what if I become a burden to you and the others–”

“Shhh,” Patton holds onto him tighter, “I won’t let anyone speak badly of my kiddos–not even you.”

Virgil lets out a shuddering laugh.“What are you going do to those who do?”

“I’ll physically fight them.”

The ridiculousness of it causes Virgil to laugh even more.

“Patton,” He says, “I–I don’t know what I want to do when I grow up. Logan and Roman know for certain what they wanna be, but I don’t. Is that a bad thing?”

Patton draws back to look at Virgil in the face.

“No it isn’t,” He says, “It’s okay not to know. Sometimes figuring out what you want to be–it takes awhile. You may not be able to see it right now, but you someday you will. Sometimes it can change–Roman and Logan might end up on different path than they expect or they might not. You won’t know until you get there.”

“How do you know when you reached that point?”

Patton hums, as he smiles conspicuously.

“I imagine it’s hard for someone who hasn’t experienced it to imagine what it’s like, but trust me, it’s something you  _want_ to try finding out for yourself. Because when you know, you’ll know.” He winks.

“That’s not at all cryptic.” Virgil grumbles.

“Sorry kiddo, but I’m afraid that’s just how it is,” Patton laughs as he tussles with Virgil’s hair, “In the meantime, just remember I love you no matter what, and I’ll support you in whatever endeavors you embark on!”

“Promise?” Virgil asks.

“I promise.” 

It’s only two words, but there’s so much sincerity and love wrapped within those two words that for once, Virgil truly believes them. He launches himself back at Patton, knocking the man onto the bed.

“Oof!” Patton cries out, but he eagerly gathers Virgil into his arms.

The two lay there in the comforting silence for an immeasurable amount of time. Virgil almost falls asleep as Patton runs his hand through Virgil’s hair in a relaxing motion.

“Hey kiddo?” Patton whispers.

“Hmm?”

“You want take your math homework downstairs to the kitchen table and go over with it with me?”

“Sure.” Virgil untangles himself from Patton, and starts to collect his things.

“Great!” Patton gets off the bed and stretches prior to turning to face him once more, “I’ll go down and whip something up for you to eat  _before_ we work on the math problems. No buts!”

Patton exits before Virgil can protest.

Virgil sighs, rolling his eyes.“Okay,  _Dad_.”


End file.
